Sunday, October 3, 2010

More practice...thanks??

Trying to be grateful tonight.  Grateful that I am sober and have tools to deal with this ever-exciting rollercoaster ride of my life. 

It really just keeping coming doesn't it?

I told my sponsor I was tired of practicing last week.  Thinking my HP might agree and pull back some of the life lessons for a couple of days, I also directed that comment upward.  I told her that I'm pretty sure that the universe is taking advantage of my willingness and giving me as much as possible because who knows how long it will last.

My main challenge as of late is to continue to live by spirtual principles, to act responsibly and with integrity, in situations where I want to say, FUCK IT!  Instead, I continue to try desparately to get my heart in line with my head and get out of this self will and in line with want the universe wants. 

Doncha know that this alcoholic wants what she wants, when she wants it dammit!  I want to scream, I've got patience down...can we please move on already.  I guess that is just proof that I don't.  So gratitude it is.  Yay!!! More practice!!

4 comments:

  1. I totally dig your blog...very honest and heartfelt, I've added you to my blog roll and thank you for blogging!!! I cannot wait to read more!!!

    Happy Sober Sunday!

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  2. this made me smile....b/c I can soooo relate.

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  3. I can so relate to this post! I have walked in your shoes, felt exactly how you're feeling! I was in such a hurry to "get sobriety" early on... I used to pray for patience, I don't do that any more, lol.

    I'm glad ya stopped by, glad I stopped by your place as well! Thanks for the honesty!

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  4. This web of recovery and support I have found on line is blowing me away...thanks for being out there and listening to the ramblings of this alcoholic. ♥

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